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Rachael Bender Click to EMail Rachael%20BenderClick to check IP address of the poster Jun-14-00, 06:26 PM (EST)
"Our newest message board"
We realize that being a single mother creates unique issues in parenting. So here's a place where you can get answers from other single working moms or just a place to vent!

If you have any suggestions for additional board topics please email me rachael@bluesuitmom.com

Best,
Rachael

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onlymom Click to EMail onlymomClick to check IP address of the poster Jul-26-00, 10:32 AM (EST)
2. "RE: Our newest message board"
I'm a single mom and it's hard. My child's father lives cross country and I have no family close by. Everything falls on your shoulders.

Does anyone have any tips for creating a support system?

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anonmom Click to EMail anonmomClick to check IP address of the poster Jul-26-00, 06:56 PM (EST)
3. "RE: Our newest message board"
Play groups! If you don't know of any, or they don't interest you, start your own - I'll bet you could find a few other moms, single or married, who would welcome the chance to grab a few hours to themselves. It's also nice "adult" company for you, too, if you just need a friend to chat with. It could be a short-term thing too, to test the waters. Make up a list of activities to do every Wed. afternoon (for ex.), for a few weeks. This way you'll see if there's true interest, and if it's a group you and your child gel with.
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Barbara Day Click to EMail Barbara%20DayClick to check IP address of the poster Mar-05-01, 06:41 PM (EST)
10. "RE: Our newest message board"
Creating a suppport system is something that has become a challenge. As a single mom with 2 children that are now young teenagers, I found that although people were willing to be of help initially, that the many issues of being a single mom without a support system could easily inundate even the most helpful friend. That is not to discourage you for making groups and alliances with friends and even co-workers, but to be realistic with what you hope to gain from those relationships.

If I can be honest and direct, I found that the most important thing in dealing with everything alone, which for me includes financially supporting my children without assistance from their father, is to let go of certain expectations. I had to expect that I would have to use my vacation time to deal with the simple matters of child illness and getting them to the doctor or dentist. I had to let go of the expectation of having a clean house. I had to forgo being jealous or critical of friends or family who did not seem to appreciate the help and support that they took for granted.I do not lose my temper over material things that I cannot afford to buy. I remember that when I go without new clothes that I am putting money away for their college education. I had to give myself permission to say that at 9pm I am off duty. When my kids were smaller, they were in bed by this time. Now that they are young teenagers, everything that they need in time and assistance from me has to be accomplished by that time. Then I can read, or take a bath or pay bills or play on the internet or catch up on friendships- whatever it is that makes me feel like a whole and complete person. That is the most important support system that you can create- the one that you control and one that you give yourself.

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cherylkf Click to EMail cherylkfClick to check IP address of the poster Mar-06-01, 12:17 PM (EST)
11. "RE: Summer activities"
I know this is early, but does anyone have any suggestions for summer activities for a tweenager? He's "just" to old for daycare, and too young for a lot of the teenager activities. I have a very limited income and no family/friends in the area.

Thanks. )

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laurii Click to EMail lauriiClick to check IP address of the poster Apr-27-02, 01:37 PM (EST)
14. "RE: Summer activities"
Look into the possibility of a church camp or a day camp through the YMCA. Some organizations hold day camps and they do not cost a whole lot of money. You could also look into a rec department pass or a YMCA pass for somewhere for him to go on a daily basis.
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RGulyas Click to EMail RGulyasClick to check IP address of the poster Oct-09-00, 11:22 AM (EST)
5. "RE: Our newest message board"
Hi Ladies,
I too am a single mom and thought I'd share a money saving tip that I recently discovered. My daughter was turning 4 and had been asking me for months "When's it gonna be my party?". Well, staying on a budget while throwing a birthday bash for her and 22 of her classmates is non-existent. By the time you pick the place, the menu, the party bags for each child, the cake, icecream & decorations, and buy your child a gift(s), you might be considering a personal loan. So here's a money saving idea to think about... bring the party to the kids. That's right, have it at your childs school. Some of the benefits of doing it this way are:

1. All of your child's friends can be there.
2. Most pre-schools welcome FREE entertainment for the
kids and won't charge you for using their facilities.
3. You don't have to feed the kids (i.e. pizza, chips, etc.)
unless you want to. They already eat lunch at school, so
have the party later in the day.
4. Easy clean-up.

Approximate Costs:
1. Using the pre-school facilites/classroom: FREE
2. Cake & Icecream (Wholesale Club): $20
3. Party bags & decorations (dollar & party store): $50
4. Clown for 1 hour (prices vary) $100

If $170 is still over your budget, leave out the entertainment or create your own. Most pre-schools have slides and swing sets outdoors that you can use, or bring a friend to help you do face-painting, story telling, play games, etc.

I gave invitations to each child just as I would if the party were at my house. This was basically to let the parents know about the cake, icecream, and face-painting incase there were any objections. More than half of the kids brought a present to school, and everybody had a good time. I could tell by my daughters reactions she felt like a Princess that day, and we're now talking about "When's it gonna be my party again?".

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Employhost Click to EMail EmployhostClick to check IP address of the poster Oct-09-00, 10:41 PM (EST)
6. "RE: Our newest message board"
LAST EDITED ON Oct-09-00 AT 10:41 PM (EST)

Very interesting ideas. I must admit, I've never spent that much on a preschool party, or my grade school children's parties even (it was never in the budget) - I have brought the party to school on occasion, though.

These kids are just happy to have a bunch of balloons - for a craft, I bake cupcakes and give them a cup of candies to decorate their own, and for games my 5 year old is still asking me to play games like musical chairs, frozen tag, ring around the rosies - they still love to play little games and sing songs. I have tried not to get parties too complicated - they begin to expect so much. The best parties we have had have have also been the cheapest, getting everyone to meet us at the park for a weiner roast and cake, presents back at the house later, or having the kids just play.

By the way, I have always limited my children's parties - none of my 3 have ever had more than 8 school friends to a party - it is sometimes hard to choose, but the fact is that I don't want to be taking care of 22 kids, my children do not play with all of them, and my children don't need that many presents!

Karen Girard
Career Planning and Development Host
www.bellaonline.com/career/your_career/career_planning_and_development/
Forum: www.delphi.com/be-employ

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Joanne60 Click to EMail Joanne60Click to check IP address of the poster Feb-22-01, 05:16 PM (EST)
7. "Amy & Isabelle"
There is a great book that is being turned into a movie called Amy & Isabelle. I am the single mother with a daughter and the book really inspired me to open up my relationships. I am looking for more books from the author Elizabeth Strout, I don't know if she is a single mother, but I could really relate to her writing.
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laree16 Click to EMail laree16Click to check IP address of the poster Feb-28-01, 03:21 PM (EST)
8. "RE: Amy & Isabelle"
I too am a single mother. I've heard about the book but I didn't know it was going to be a movie. I get so busy doing things with my daughter that by the end of the day I don't have time to read. Maybe the movie will offer me some guidence befor and problems should occure. Thanks for the suggestion!

PS- When is the movie?

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Rachael Bender Click to EMail Rachael%20BenderClick to check IP address of the poster Mar-02-01, 09:27 PM (EST)
9. "RE: Amy & Isabelle"
The movie was produced by Oprah and is suppose to air this Sunday on ABC. Elizabeth Shue is playing Isabelle.

So don't miss it March 4th 9/8 p.m. Central.

You can get a behind the scenes look at
http://www.oprah.com/about/owp/amyisa/owp_amyisa_main.html

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sobe Click to EMail sobeClick to check IP address of the poster Apr-14-01, 09:22 AM (EST)
12. "RE: Single Parents"
We have done several luncheons and ice cream tasting parties to
benefit organizations promoting the welfare of single parent families. Frankly, despite all the talk about the need of single parents to network, the turnout for these events has been very poor.
Is there a need for single parent networkers? How can my business
be of help?
Tout Sweet is an old fashioned ice cream parlor & bakery cafe, located in Delray Beach (corner of Linton Blvd, next to the Regal 18 movie theater). Any comments or suggestions from single parents would be appreciated.


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kem623 Click to EMail kem623Click to check IP address of the poster Aug-20-03, 02:28 PM (EST)
16. "Side Business of a Single Mom"
I also created a side business to help with finances (and to keep me busy) when I divorced. My daughter is now 4, and it's still a heavy load, but it gives me something of my own, and makes me feel like I'm doing something beneficial for me AND my kid.

My website is www.preschoolpicassos.com - I offer craft/activity packages for preschool age children as a monthly subscription service.

My only conflict is that I don't have any real support structure, and being this busy does not allow me to work on socializing or playgroups. Any ideas from other busy moms?

Kate

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