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Ask the Expert: Finding Balance Natalie Gahrmann is a success coach and owner of N-R-G Coaching Associates, a private coaching company that specializes in helping working parents achieve mastery of work and life. Her clients experience more clarity, direction and alignment while reducing stress in their busy lives.
Child Cries When Mom LeavesHeather writes, "How do you handle your child crying for you not to leave him at lunch time?"Answer: Without having further details about the age of your child and the specific situation, it's difficult to give you a direct answer to your question. When my son was 9 months old, I went back to work full-time and left him initially with a babysitter in my home and then by 12-months he was attending daycare at a highly reputable center. He cried every time I left him regardless of who he was being left with until he learned to adapt. Handling my emotional response and being positive was extremely important during those early days. Also, it was important to insure that both me and my son felt comfortable with the care providers. Find out how long it takes your son to calm down after you leave. If he calms down pretty quickly and seems happy when you return to pick him up, you probably have nothing to worry about. If, however, he is just as distraught when you return to pick him up, look into matters further. You may need to experiment with different settings and providers until you find the right match for him. If you are returning to visit with your son at lunchtime and this is causing him to be upset at you leaving him a second time, perhaps, you can minimize or discontinue this lunch time visit. I've found that by making my exits quick and matter of fact, it helped tremendously. Hanging around or going back to console usually exacerbates the problem. Hope things work out for you and your son!
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