Ask the Expert

Dr. Roni Leiderman, Associate Dean at The Family and School Center of Nova Southeastern University, is not only an expert on parenting issues but the working mother of two children.

Whining

Question: My 5 year old son always whines and cries before bathtime and bedtime. Any good tips on parenting practices and ways in which we can reduce the whining?
- Mary K.

Answer: Children whine for attention. Plain and simple. The way, therefore, to stop whining, is not to pay attention to it.

As with all routines, maintain consistency. It is helpful for your child to have input into the things he can do before bed and bath time. Consider making a visual schedule of his choices. For instance, take photos of him brushing his teeth, taking a bath, getting into his pajamas, reading a story with you, kissing you goodnight, and getting into bed. Young children learn through play so incorporate lots of fun along the way like a silly goodnight song or kisses and tickles as part of the routine. You can make this into a book or hang it on his wall. Then make every attempt to stick to it!

Ignore his whining. He may get louder and whine longer if you don't pay attention to him, at first, but in time he will understand that you won't respond to his whines. Remember to encourage him when he successfully follows his schedule. "You got into the bath with a smile on your face! That's great!"

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