Getting the family to pitch in

By Joy Dixon

After surviving another hectic day at the office, the last thing you want is to come home to another full-time job. The moment you walk in it feels like a battle zone. Your kids are whining because they want dinner, the dog needs to be walked, the laundry needs to be done and the living room needs to be picked up before your houseguests arrive this weekend. You're tired and overwhelmed. What's a working mom to do? Muster up that last bit of energy to find creative ways to get your spouse and children to help around the house.

Make it a game
Convince your kids that chores are actually fun! Sometimes a little deception is necessary. One creative way to get everyone to help is to make a game out of the chores. Write all the chores that need to be done on separate pieces of paper. Fold them and place them in a jar or a hat. Have everyone pick chores. Everyone picks a chore until all of them are done. Then, start a timer a see who can complete theirs first.

If your family lacks enthusiasm, have a reward system. Just like you put the chores in a hat or jar, write down rewards and place them in a different hat. When the chores are done have everyone pick from the reward jar for jobs well done. Some good choices for rewards are: TV time, going to the park, going swimming, treats.

Getting help from Older Children
Games just don't work on older kids, but reasoning might. You may just want to try to talk to them. Talk to them like an adult and explain that unless the chores get done you won't be able to take the to the mall or to their soccer game. As much as they may try to hide it, they really want to be involved and included in your life. Reminder that regardless of their reaction, talk to them like they are adults and you'll notice an attitude adjustment.

If approached in the correct manner and the situation is explained to them, chances are they will take matters into their own hands and help around the house. You can give them specifics and make them more responsible for themselves. Have them do their own laundry, fold their own laundry, clean their own room, clean their bathroom. Your children will probably surprise you and actually like the responsibility of taking care of themselves. If they do an exceptional job, surprise them with something they wanted or do something special with them. Even older children like to be noticed and rewarded. They need praise too!

Getting the Toddlers Involved
Young toddlers are a different story all together. When you get home they DEMAND your attention. They are too young to understand Mommy has things to do. They are also too young to really help. What they need is quality time with their parents. Before the bedtime story and after playtime, have them help with some of the chores.

If laundry needs to be folded, put the pile of clothes on the couch or a chair and give them a couple of articles to fold. At first you may have to re-fold them but they will learn quickly. If you have to re-fold the clothes, do not do it in front of them. If they see you redoing what they do they will give up. Just show positive reinforcement. Setting examples and giving responsibilities are so vital for the child's development.

This example also works with picking up toys and putting toys away. If you say come on we are going to put your toys away they will follow your lead. With positive reinforcement in no time you will have them picking up and putting their toys away. They will know and understand what you expect from them. As they get older and their abilities increase you can teach them new things, as you see fit. In the beginning you have to have patience, but it will pay off tremendously. Finding ways to get your children to help around the house isn't easy, but with a little creativity and effort you can have a household full of helpers.

Joy Dixon is the mother of one.