A lesson from TV

By Maria Bailey

There isn't often a television program that I enjoy watching other than Stone Phillips for the obvious reason that he's just plain cute. I don't know if it's just that there isn't anything of quality on the tube or that I've become so busy that I get antsy sitting there trying to laugh with pre-recorded audiences. I used to enjoy one hour of brainless escapism when Melrose was on. My kids always knew when it was Monday because dinner was normally cooked in a crock pot and they were put to bed 30 minutes early. Now that I reflect on those Mondays, I have to pat myself on the back for demonstrating some guilt-free moments of relaxation. Fellow mothers can appreciate the effort it takes sometimes to do something for yourself without feeling guilty. But boy when you do, it's just great, until you realize, of course, that you aren't feeling guilty and you go back to the feeling you find most comfortable--guilt.

Anyways, the other night I found one of those rare moments when I was sitting on the couch in control of the remote. You can already guess that my children were in bed and my husband was busy. Why else would I be sitting and have the remote? I found my way to the new David Kelly show, "Boston Public." I didn't watch long enough to form an opinion on the show, but I did appreciate a piece of great dialogue in it.

I love good dialogue. There is nothing like it. My husband would say his favorite piece of dialogue was "You can't handle the truth!" from "A Few Good Men," but mine comes from my youngest son's favorite video, "Hook" with Robin Williams. Hook says to Peter Pan's children, "Me, me, mine, mine, all you do is fight and think of your needs. Do you really think your parents love you? Of course not, they wait anxiously each night for the time when you go to bed so they can relax and relive the time before they had you." I think it's a very telling bit of script. Think about it. I'll be the first to confess that on those Melrose Monday nights, I longed for the days when I could plop on the couch without worrying about making lunches or checking homework. And I'm sure to an evil villain like Hook, it illustrated the relationship between parent and child. When I feel myself at the breaking point, I always think about that dialogue and wonder if my children are interpreting my actions this way. It's bad enough that Keenan, my youngest son thinks he's captain Hook but I don't need him thinking like him as well.

So, back to the great dialogue I heard on Boston Public. The scene was a young teacher talking about the challenges of being a teacher. Here's what she said, "I picked this profession because I wanted to make a difference, but no one respects what I do. Ninety percent of my graduating class is in love with the almighty dollar and each day they go to work to find a way to earn more even if it means that they have to bend their ethics and I'm the one who is fingerprinted! The parents don't respect me because they know I chose a low-paying career or disagree on my methods, they communicate that disrespect to their children and subsequently, I am treated with disrespect from my students. So in the end, how can I make a difference in their lives?" Wow, I thought. How true this is? How often do parents complain about the amount of homework assigned by a math teacher or the tough grading system used by a grammar professor? Not only do we do it but many of us forget and do it in front of our children. It's no wonder they think they can get away with murder at school. Our children's attitude about school, their teachers and their lessons begin at home. The more we support those individuals who have committed themselves to teaching our children, the more successful our children will be in school.

So before we blame the teacher next time there is a problem with our children's schoolwork, stop, think and remember this little piece of good dialogue because good dialogue is as hard to find as the time to sit on the couch and listen to it. So when you find both, hold on to them.

Share your thoughts on our message board or email Maria.

Also see:
• Week Eleven -- I did it!
• Week Ten -- Setting a goal
• Week Nine -- I've been busted
• Week Eight -- Classroom politics
• Week Seven -- When a mom's life ends too soon
• Week Six -- Parenting mistakes
• Week Five -- What are we really saying?
• Week Four -- The courage to take risks
• Week Three -- The business trip
• Week Two -- Reflections of motherhood
• Week One -- A trip to the grocery store

Maria Bailey is the CEO and founder of BlueSuitMom.com and a mother of four children under the age of seven.